diff --git a/.irssi/scripts/autorun/dynamic-nick.pl b/.irssi/scripts/autorun/dynamic-nick.pl
new file mode 100644
index 00000000..56ece68c
--- /dev/null
+++ b/.irssi/scripts/autorun/dynamic-nick.pl
@@ -0,0 +1,34 @@
+#
+# dynamic-nick.pl — sets the irssi default nick to `|<hostname> at startup,
+# so the same dotfiles give each machine its own distinctive nick without
+# having to hand-edit the config per host.
+#
+# Drops into ~/.irssi/scripts/autorun/, loads on irssi start.
+#
+
+use strict;
+use warnings;
+use vars qw($VERSION %IRSSI);
+use Irssi;
+use Sys::Hostname qw(hostname);
+
+$VERSION = '0.1';
+%IRSSI = (
+    authors     => 'dissimulo',
+    contact     => 'connect+gitea@dustin-williams.com',
+    name        => 'dynamic-nick',
+    description => 'Set the default nick to `|<hostname> at startup.',
+    license     => 'MIT',
+);
+
+sub set_dynamic_nick {
+    my $host = hostname();
+    # trim anything past the first dot — some systems return FQDNs, which
+    # are longer than most IRCd nick limits (typically 16–30 chars).
+    $host =~ s/\..*$//;
+    my $nick = '`|' . $host;
+    Irssi::command("^set nick $nick");
+    Irssi::print("dynamic-nick: default nick set to $nick", MSGLEVEL_CLIENTCRAP);
+}
+
+set_dynamic_nick();